Saturday, January 1, 2011

Massa Scale, I am yowe grasshoppa

January 1st of twenty eleven is now guys. NOAW! And I gots the Determination Bug! And a You'reafuckingfatassgetoffyourassgettothegymandstaythefuckawayfromfood Virus. How do I get infest with such viciousness you ask? (Just go with it, ask.) Answer: I stepped on the scale.

I have been avoiding those red digits of truth for...a long ass time. And just like that I was it's bitch again. All day these numbers have haunted my psyche. (Okay, it's only 1:30pm and I got up at 10:50am. WHATEVER! THE SCALE IS FUCKING WITH ME HARDCORE!) And I'm not talking Casper the Friendly Ghost here. I'm talkin' Pet Semetary ish, the dude with the gashed in head and globs of Ghostbuster ghosts trying to attack me and take over my body I so much as think in the general direction of the kitchen. I hid under my blankets for a good half hour, afraid the Fat Monsters were gonna get me.

But they already have! It swallowed me up in 2010 and then threw me up in 2011. It's time to get all Janitor up in this bitch and clean up house. Fortunately for me I got the handy dandy gym pass to help me out in Operation: Fat Sucker and also aiding me in Mission: Ferret.

I am truly heartbroken about the Truth Digits but y'know what? It's time to face up and do something about it. All the heartbreak needs to go into the Determination Bug! (I need to find a new term for that....cuz like I want to be a Determination Bug Monster but like...not.) AND! It could have been worse. I wasn't too bad last night. I was like....a normalish person. No bingeing on food or drink. Can you imagine the NomVommery that would be in full force swing right now like a hurricanic tornado tsunami beast if I was hungover, remorseful, and cravey?! Oh the horror! THA WHORRRRAH!!!!

2011: All food goes documented and counted. Exercise happens everyday! Daily weigh ins.

"Not all that is faced can be changed, but nothing can change until it is faced." 

2 comments:

  1. Ugh I need to become a Determination Bug, too. I am almost glad that I don't have a scale available to me right now, because I would probably not leave my room for days if I knew the truth about how much I weighed. I feel like a whale right now, and I need to turn all this hatred of my body into a bug of determ-in-a-tion. We can do this!

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  2. OMG I HAVE THE DETERMINATION BUG!
    Not for the last 2 days coz I've been recovering from lack of sleep and too much of this and that XD
    Tomorrow is my official beginning of my own opperation (FAST YOU FAT BITCH XD)
    Hopefully we can face this together! WOOO! :D
    <3

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