Tuesday, December 29, 2009

But I'm glad it's over.

Alert the media hell hath frozen over!


But I am on day 20 (DAY TWENTY!!!! AAaaaaaahhhhh!!!! [insert FlashDance moves here]) of no purging.  Holy Mosus (or something) this must be my Christmas Miracle!

I must have made Santa's "Nice List" this year!


Seriously.  My Christmas was good, I got nice gifts (I ain't gonna lie, I even got myself some gifts...and they seem to keep coming) (What? They're Christmas sales...CHRISTMAS. I made the NICE LIST remember!!) and I got some money!  $10 in Starbucks, $50 in American Express...a THOU$AND DOLLAR check from my mom's boyfriend to help me out with school.  Sweetest. Man. EVAR!  In fact, he even asked me about a month or so back if I need any help with anything because he knows I've been struggling but, of course, I said no because I would NEVER ask him for money (he does well) but it was really sweet of him to even offer, my mom didn't even know he asked until I told her.

So fantastical, right?

And then there's food.  I've been doing okay.  Really trying to keep my calories between 900-1200 which I consider a "healthy" amount and I'm eating eggwhites up the wazooloo to be sure and get my protein needs. (Protein also helps with not being hungry btw.)  On Christmas, I pretty much ate normally and at my aunts house ("at Christmas") I had salad and veggies from the veggie tray (I did eat cocktail sauce with them...boo) and *gulp* I had *deep breathes* two slices of HOMEMADE apple pie and 2 HOMEMADE macadamia nut cookies.  Terrible! 

BUT in my defensive (read: to make myself feel better about these Bad Decisions) I did not have:
  • Pumpkin Pie
  • Bread Pudding
  • Chocolate Cake
  • Ice Cream
  • Whip Cream
  • MORE Apple Pie
  • MORE Cookies
I didn't drink a lot (despite that I had already decided alcohol doesn't have calories) (yea-yea, LA-LA LA-LA I can't hear you!!!) and I did only have veggies and salad and managed to ignore the chips and spinach artichoke dip...and I didn't purge. So damnit it wasn't a failure! I was weak and I stumbled but I did not fall.

The day after Christmas I went up North to see my Aunt and Uncle (on my dad side) celebrate their 25th wedding anniversary by renewing their vows.  I was anxious and I didn't want to go mainly because last time I went up there it was during Thanksgiving and I ate the entire world and then threw up what I could of it.  Fun. I realize that my mistake was the lack of protein (no protein = CONSTANT hunger) so I did a little research and found these little gems:

My SAVIORS!!  I don't usually eat those bar things because they're mainly sugar and carbs and fat and they are like a gazillion calories and "high protein" is like 6 to 9 grams.  No thanks, I may as well have a damn Snickers bar.  But these little gems pack in 20 grams of protein and only 2-3 grams of sugar which is a damn good ratio for a bar if you ask me and they keep hunger and cravings almost obsolete!

I got the shakes too.  4 cans of 110 calories 20 grams of protein.  This mornings weigh in was 118.5 lbs. (you can friend me on LoseIt! App: FlushedAgain@gmail.com) We'll see what tomorrow brings but lately I've been a steady 120 so...this is a nice number to see.
The wedding party was Super Duper Fun Times, the Tequila was flowing heavily and the music was Mexican (my dad side are like TOTAL MEXICANS-thetalkingwasallinspanish-MEXICAN) but I danced.

(I use that the term "dance" loosely-I'm not so good)

(but tequila me and I think I'm FANTASTICAL!!)

(Tequila is Magic, I'm convinced.)

My feet hate me.  The top of my thighs burned in approval.   So, I'm pretty sure all my dancing was decent calorie burn for the oily vegetables and the 20,253,948 fantastick-illion Margaritas I drank.

I resisted the bread.

2 points to Flushed.

And I saw my dad on the night of the party and the next day we had lunch, not very easy picking a place since I'm a vegetarian and not into Mexican food and his diet is Heavy Mexican food and Bud Light.  My suggestion of Olive Garden was met with a big fat question mark, you'd have thought that I suggested some hole in the wall Taiwan Food place that's rumored to have served cats, dogs and tarantulas.

No dad, this is not a trap.  They have a Zagat Rating for Pete's Sake!!

(My father does not have nor knows how to use a cell phone.)

(Just sayin.)

So we went to some sports bar-ish Mexican restaurant (not a hole in the wall, not a chain) I had a house salad and steamed veggies and a calorie-free Pomegranate Martini (LA-LA LA-LA I can't hear you!!) with salsa for my dressing and he had his damn Chili Verrrrrrde Buryto that was about the size of a mail box, some Bud Lights and, of course, the chips and salsa that was at the table.
I resisted.

Point! Flushed.

Also, add $100 from Dad to that tally.  And more unemployment checks.
Things are looking good, 2010 is going to be a good year.

Day 20! SQUEEEEE!!


  1. one big fat 'LoL' from me.
    congrats, sounds like ur doing pretty damn good.. haha thanks, im going to give the protein thing a try..again.
    On xmas day my eating was controlled to around 500cals, so proud.
    But yesterday my brain decided that it was time to have a real xmas lunch and eat my whole house, furniture included.
    I just posted it, check it out if u want, u'll never purge again!!
    maybe ;)
    good luck

  2. oh wow wow WOW
    Baby you are fucking amazing! 20 days??? I'm only at about 20 MINUTES! I'm so impressed. Your Christmas was amazing!! A couple of bits of pie and bickies?? Big deal! It was CHRISTMAS and that's the worst you did? Awesome! And I too have decided alcohol has no calories this holidays... ;).

    Plus I LOVE lo-carb protein bars too! When I'm doing well I pretty much live off them. They are like delicious chocolate bars with half the calories and a ton of protein. So so awesome :). And egg whites too. They are incredible. So unbelievably low in calories and pure protein.

    Come new years I plan to be good. GOOD GOOD GOOD just like you my dear.



  3. Of course you made the nice list, and you deserve all those self-presents. :)
    No way am i gonna argue with u about alcohol having calories. If you say it has no calories and i say it has no calories, that's good enough for me. Lol.
    Those protein bars and shakes sound like a good idea. Like you, i've never really eaten or drunk (drunken? drank? whats the proper word there?) them because they're just like a candy bar, but the ones you got sound great.
    You're doing fantastic, dearie!

  4. I'm so proud of you for not purging! :D You rock!

  5. 20 days??!!! WOW. Just Wow. You are my hero! I am just so proud for you.

    And you are soooo right about the protein. I am "fasting" the month of January but adding in occasional protein shakes to keep the hunger at bay and hopefully not to lose too much muscle mass.

    You are doing great! You go girl!


  6. wow congrats on the 20 day mile marker. you sound like a new woman.lol.
    its good to hear that your doing good. and omg you got a shit ton of money for the holidays, you should tell your mom to give that man a "special" christmas present.
    good job on the weight loss too, i wouldnt be able to avoid tacos. :)
    stay strong


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