Wednesday, August 5, 2009
Float Upon a Bloat...
Yup, it's all regret and slothery in my corner of the couch. Watermelon kicked my ass today. So did mountains upon mountains of salad and veggies and eggwhites and nuts and oatmeal...aaarggh!! Too much! Much too much. I'm disgusting! I make myself sick!
(Not literally though because I'm on Day 4.)
Clearly Skinny Bitching was not on my mind despite my rave review! I just keep eating too much, it's not bad food but eating your weight in watermelon and salad? Excessive. Unacceptable.
You like how I'm doing something about it? All pro-active-like?
Surely the bloat will blog away....with my fingers moving like lightning! Typing, it's the latest craze in fitness! Read all about it in FatAss Fatness, pick up a copy at your local Fattery. They're free and promise to burn calories of the imaginary persuasion only. That's right, folks. No need to worry about turning into a Skinny Bitch reading this pile of gluttony.
I need to get my ass off the couch and DO SOMETHING! Put on my Nike's and Just Do It! Except they're New Balance and don't have a slogan.
No slogan, no deal. How am I gonna get motivated and work out with no gimmick?
It's like there's this big blubbery walrus wearing an orange polyester suit with horizontal stripes in the room with me. Taunting me and poking at my fat.
I'm gonna look at Thinspo now in hopes that it will inspire me to move muscles further away from the keyboard than my wrists...
(I wouldn't be surprised if there is another post tonight...perhaps the next one will not be written by A Crazy Person)