Monday, August 3, 2009

Silver Lining hiccups, bumps, bruises and potholes...oh my!

After months (and months and months....) (...and months!) of slothiness and fatteration things are starting to look up.


I feel like the storm is passing. I made a list (what? I'm a virgo, that's how we do.) of how my life is taking direction:

  • EDD has got my cashflow back in action.
  • My body is becoming less and less like that of a walrus and taking a bit more shape (Thank you: Calorie Counting, Eating Healthy, Exercise, Will Power and a little Self Control)
  • My Leg Pain is a goner (thanx to my self doctorization :)
  • I'm Starting School (Assessment Test tomorrow, Orientation/Counselor Stuff on Friday)
  • Playing softball Fridays and Sundays now. (Exercise) (Well, kinda. Slow Pitch really isn't much but I get out and it's fun)
  • My aunts friend really wants me to do some design work for her and wants to compensate me for said work! (moneymoneymoney-MuuuuuuuuNeh!)
  • My aunts also says she can get me into working at FedEx. (Health Bennies from Day 1. Exercise.) (I think EDD pays me more but I'm not sure how EDD+School pays out just yet. And Bennies would be nice.)

It's direction. It's a start. A start that I'm actually looking forward to.

Since I've gotten laid off I've felt like I was treading water in the middle of the ocean, 360 degrees of no land in sight. I've finally picked a direction and began to swim.

That's the Silver Lining.
And now for the Cloud...

I think I have anxiety.
On Saturday night, I binged and purged (still no more than 1200 cals for the day though) so that sucked cuz I went from Day 9 to Fail to 1 to Fail and today I'm Day 2. I don't get "bumps in the road" I get "hiccups". "Hiccups" is a funner word to say tho, so it's got that going for it. These "hiccups" I think triggered an "Anxiety" thing(?) because my body (head-shoulders-kneees and toes, teeth and earlobes...) was all numb and tingling likes it's never tingled before and I wanted to scream and jump out of my own skin. It was CrazyTown, CrazyTown in my body. So I guess this is some kind of "Anxiety" thing according to Google.

So that sux.

And Friday night the battery on my car died after my game. I got soso so so lucky that a few girls from the team were still there and knew the whole shebang and helped me out. I was so embarrassed. Not only does my car battery die but my car thought it would be funny to play hide and go seek with the hood release.

Right, I couldn't find it. I promise you though it WAS hard to find! Curse you, Japanese and your trickery! I felt like such an idiot.

The girls were asking me the typical questions...

Haven't you ever popped your hood before? should be....maybe not....

Don't you get your car serviced?
Yeah, I just take it to the dealer, my car tells me when it's time. Don't check the oil because it tells me right when it's low.

Luxury has rendered me it's Stuck-On-Stupid Victim.


I'm really not that stupid! REALLY! I used to have a car that's battery died all the time. I DID know how and actually check the oil on it. It was even stick shift! I put air in the tires...granted, I was no mechanic or even mechanics apprentice but I knew the basic survival needs of the car. Popping the hood? Did it in my sleep.)

(And have always been well equipped with the trusty Triple A)

So embarrassed.

Luckily, my mom is out of town until next Monday so I'm just driving her gas guzzler until I'm done giving my car the Silent Treatment.

And then once I was up and running my screen comes on and it's asking for some sort of code. And I was like Fuck You Japanese and your Trickery! You're dead to me!

But on the inside.

I didn't want some crazy Japanese Spy Satellite to hear me and turn my shit off again.


I'm pretty sure there was more Dark Clouds of Cloudiness to be blogged when I started typing but I forgot so...You're Welcome.

P.S. True Blood is INTENSE this season, right?! Love it!

P.P.S. Oh yeah and boys are starting to take notice of me again. So that's always good. I'm getting my Cute&Confident Swagger back. (I think the jigglies were hiding it!) (Boo Jigglies! Get the Hell Out!)


  1. lol, japaneseians have lost your love
    your blog is so funny to read. you seem like such a laid back person whos has a really good sense of humour. keep tht up, lol
    & goodluck with everything going on for you.#
    i so understand what you're saying about 360degrees of no land in sight. well done for finding a direction

  2. Anonymous4.8.09

    boo jigglies!
    boys are cool. :)
    japanese trickery is not. fo sho.

  3. Haha. Japanese trickery is the worst. Good to hear that you're doing well other than that though. Oh how did you get rid of your leg pain?! Must know, must know! Lol. I have leg pain of my own that wont leave.

  4. I love boys! pity they dont love me ha!
    well done Im very proud of u!
    let me no wat u think of skinny bitch! x

  5. YAAY cute&confident swagger. I might have to quote you later on that phrase, since it's amazing.

    UGH, I haaate anxiety. That crawling out of your skin feeling is horrible. I also have gotten a "I feel like I could scurry up the wall or jump out the window and fly" kind of feeling that's hard to shake. Bleh, sending you some virtual ativan...

  6. heey, he'll survive, jason mraz can handle it.
    i know you want a slice of jason too!;) lol

    thanks for the motivation, i know it was stupid to think i should have to lie to get accepted by people :(
    no more lying..promise :D

    goodluck! x-x


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