Trigger Me Timbers

I mess around with photoshop a lot (A LOT) so whenever anybody in the fam bam needs an invitation or anything of the graphic nature I am their go-to graphic designer.

I am supposed to have something to show my cousin tonight for her mom's party. I designed something a few months back that everybody seems to "love". It's printed out on a 4x6 picture and my mom has held it captive in her purse for show and tell. Strangers have seen this design.

Oh mother.

Le sigh.

Her boyfriends daughter happens to be a big shot in fashion. Like people wear stuff that she approves for the brand that she works for. She also liked the design but had some suggestions...to make it more summery, since the party is in the summer. Ummm... I'M NOT A PROFESSIONAL WOMAN! WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME!! Okay, not really but kinda. I'm just sensitive because I'm insecure and this is my much love little hobby and I so desperately want to be good at it so I'm just sensitive.

I'm constantly wonder if people say nice things to be nice, y'know? Like "you're pretty"-I just feel like it's something you say. Like oh your baby is so cute. A social nicety. So I don't really know what is real, do I live in a world of people who just want to be nice to me? Or is there actually some honesty thrown in the mix?

SO. I did what I could to try and summerfy that shiz and I sent it to my mom to judge. My mom is like THE WORST at niceties. She's genuinely a nice person but she's like allergic (or something) to lying. (Which probably has a lot to do with my lack of confidence.) BUT at the same time she's Mom so at least it's Rosy colored honesty (I see right through the roses which softens the blow) thus landing her the spot of my "second set of eyes" when I gotta show a third party my latest creation.

Waiting for the verdict (received during the writing of the post: "it looks great!") but it's still kind of frustrating because it's through e-mail. But she's not gonna get home in time to show and treak....I'm so, so SO anxious right now (okay, the coffee doesn't help but I'm addicted!). I can't SEE her reaction.

I called her E-meediately after I sent it like "Checkyoure-mail. Whereyouat? (lunch) Okay,Ineedyoutocheckyoure-mailandgetbacktomewhenyougetbacktotheoffice!" I'm not being dramatic and this is while I'm making a pot of coffee, grabbing a few almonds and putting a piece of bread in the toaster and turning the kettle on (to make oatmeal)-simultaneously. (Okay, maybe that's a tad dramatic. I'm not an octopus.) And then I was like whoa-whoa-whoa there...breathe.

AND THEN! I took the bread out of the toaster and put it back in the bag and turned the kettle off. And I made a salad (Typ. salad is just iceberg lettuce pk & salsa. I'm lazy.) and tried to calm down.

And now I'm gonna send it to my cousin. And I'm a mile a millisecond all over again! ARGH!! I'm so nervous and anxious and !!!!

And sorry if this post makes no sense but I can't read. Stillness is not an option right now.

I'm a jitterbug.