Thursday, October 1, 2009

Oh brother.

Oh brother.

I'm exhausted and I can't sleep. I feel like I've been sleeping with
my eyes open. They hurt and they just want to be closed but the day is
upon us and today, like yesterday, like tomorrow, there is much to do.

So much to do. So little time. Less and LESS energy.

I was happy that the number on the scale was going down but then my
body wants to sabotage this goodness with insatiable hunger, added
stress and disturbed sleep. Thanx body, eff you very much.

My car keeps going out of juice and likely the cause is that I need to
clean the battery, oh yeah, and there's the rest of the car that needs
some TLC as well.

Unemployment is supposed to be calling me today, like right now-today
to interview me and make sure that going to school isn't going to
interfere with my getting a job. Just send me checks ayholes! I worked
full-time for 5 years and two of those years I was going to school
full-time too! Help a girl out!! I'm gonna be something someday, so
stop stressin meout!!

In math there's Exam #2 that I will be taking. I'm not sure how that's
gonna go. I want an A. I want 100%. We'll see. I'll study for that
after Socio. (*fingers crossed*)

Tomorrow I need to work on designing my aunts reunion flyer which I
haven't started yet. Hopefully she likes whatever I come up with, I'm
not sure if she's just not pleased with me, her e-mails are very short-
curt almost. But then again, bitchy pessimism may just be her way. She
carries this black rainy cloud and gloomy weather with her all the
time and complains just to complain. When you try and flip it to
something positive she just can't see it. I feel bad for her. I'm
afraid to become like her. She's a perfectionist, caring more of what
others see of her than what she sees in herself even if it means being
miserable just so that she will succeed, failure is not an option. It
scares me. She's my reverse role model in a lot of said ways. I digress.

I also have to study for my mid-term in Humanities that is on Monday
(thank gawd he moved it back!). It's gonna be a difficult exam as this
is my weakest subject. I'm nit thrilled about this. I want an A but
will settle for a B. Shoot for the moon and end up amonst the stars?
Let's hope so.

I'm trying to be positive. I want to be positive and energetic and
smiley and on top of things but that ish is hard sometimes! When life
hands me lemons sometimes there's just not enough Splenda sweeten it up!

Wow. I feel like I haven't laid out my thoughts (via blog) and I feel
a bit better already...well, I'm not really hungry, so it's a step in
the right direction! Sometimes I forget about the simpler things, the
little tips and trix that help me feel better and chip away at the
stress that I pack upon my shoulders. This blog is one of them.

Sent from my iPhone.

5 comments:

  1. Good luck with your exams!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'm feeling the mid-term madness too...

    And when I first got pleurisy I thought I was dying, but THC helps with pain so smoking weed is like a contradiction - oh so good and oh so bad :P

    How long did it take you to recover? I'm so anxious to get well and back to my life! (sans cigarettes, which I'm glad I've been forced to quit)

    ReplyDelete
  3. being positive is the best way to go through things

    good luck with everything!

    ReplyDelete
  4. hey hun stay positive if u can. take one ting on at a time. do ur best.do watever makes u happy! and wrk at a rate dat doesnt put u off doin wat u wnt xx

    ReplyDelete
  5. Ah, school is stressing me out too.
    I really wish it could like, burn down or something.
    Hmm. Sounds like a plan ;)

    Yay for lower digits!! :)
    Keep goin'

    ReplyDelete

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