Saturday, September 12, 2009

One day...One Day I'll Be Living The Good Life

So right, we all know that I'm a bit social  awkward, right?

(whatevs you do now.)

And  that I have like basically no friends right?

(now you do.)

I could go on and on in a negative fashion but...whatever, let's just focus on the positive and hope that more will follow, yes?

After Thursday, I felt like I could breathe again. This week at school was quite stressful and difficult for me. I've tried to be constructive of my learnings this week and learn from them as oppose to mope about them (not that I didn't for the time being...) I gathered that:

  • I need to improve my note taking
  • Retain more specific detail as oppose to overall gysts
  • I'm predominately a visual and emotional learner and I need to apply extra effort into utilizing that into my studies.
  • Manage my time more constructively
  • Get more sleep
  • Predominately fruit & caffeine is not the best idea if random kaliedoscope spots in your vision are not you thing
  • I can't concentrate  in a messy space (but I'm too lazy/stubborn to clean it if it's not my mess)
Clearly, there is much I need to work on in terms of being "A Master Student" which is the title of one of my textbooks. And honestly, it's actually one that is easy and enjoyable to read. I really do want to be one! It's a step to being a Successful person in Life and hello, being a student is basically just learning and life is...well, basically about learning-so there you go. It all comes full circle.

(Check that Wiser 24 year old of me coming out!)

Damn, my posts are long-winded! I talk much the same so be glad you are only in contact with me in blog where you can just skim or only read the first paragraph or two-cuz just think I actually bore people in real life with Me. Get some drinks (translation: false confidence aka liquor) and BAM! I'm all Fired Up and ready to go! That's right, the monstrousity that is me, it happens in real life too. A click can't turn me off.

....oh-your still here?!! EXCELLENT!!

(It's cuz there's pictures, right?)

So yeah, my birthday was alright. I mean, I know some people love me and some of them aren't even blood related-so they don't have to, so it's super cool that they membered (I'm Mexican) ("white-washed" californian Mexican is still Mexican. So what if I say, "Bwen-nose Dee-yas"when  it's night time-"Buenos Dias" is better!!).

After getting lost in nothing all day, I went to Happy Hour with the Fam Bam, two Martini's: Mango Citrus and a Lemon Drop Martini and preceeded to lose softball through giggles and smiles and "Oh-Lay!"'s as the ball passed me by (I would have made an Excellent Matador).

I resisted:

  • Fresh Baked Focaccia Bread (and the scrumptiousness that is the olive oil/vinegar + Deliciousness spead that goes with)
  • Margherita Pizza
Okay, so what it's a short list. It's loaded. Any idea how many times I told myself just one slice wouldn't be so bad? It's my birthday? Just one?

I resisted. I saw the heat rising off the bread. NOPE. Not a bite because I knew. I KNEW that one would leave to another and another.

I can't do another again.
another again...

How many times have I shook my head in shame over another again? Too many. I've come too far to turn back into that spiral downward. I've thought about it but it's scares me. I even stuck my toothbrush down my throat a little the other morning on impulse because I missed the feeling. The thought, the impulse - it scared me, I don't want Mia anymore.

Bulimia will harm me.
Make me gain.
Make me depressed.
Make me weak.
Interfere with school.
Interfere with my goal.
Interfere with my well being.
I am strong now.
(I try to convince myself.)

I went to my high school friends apartment tonight and ended up chatting it up with a girl that graduated a year after me from the same school though me nor my friend knew her in school (we weren't all that outgoing). I chatted with her boyfriend, my friends cousin...okay, I'm totally Chatty Patty when I'm drinking. I can't help it. People intrigue me. They are so interesting. Everybody-EVERYBODY has this amazing story and dream and you just got to find it and you will immediately just want to know every little bit about them.

My first day in my Guidance class and my teacher had people volunteer to us a little about themselves (after we were all able to ask her ANYTHING about her that we desired) and some people had us holding back tears. I fell in love with every person that told us their story. I remember thinking in that class, "Wow, how did I get so blessed to be in this classroom with this Amazingly Outstanding teacher and all these AMAZING persons with these Extraordinary  Stories, these Extraordinary Dreams? How blessed I am, the Universe is smiling upon me-it believes in me."

Okay, yeah, I'm a cornball but whatever.
Today reminded me again of how blessed I am. I am surrounded by the most ExtraOrdinary people and have super opportunities.

Also, my Sis passed out the announcements for my Beautiful Baby Niece and everybody has OODLES of compliments that I "have a real talent," "I should go into business" and all that and it feels great. Creativity is so intimate and the fact that people are loving what I designs (allegedly) makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside!

(or it could be the Martinis...)

(or Mimosas...)


  1. First off, don't worry about your posts being "long-winded" I read them all from start to finish =)

    I am glad you don't want Mia, mia is terrible and sooo very stressful on the body.. as if ana isn't but a better choice between the two for sure.

    These announcements you made, were they cards or what? I make my own cards and stamp 'em and add embellishments etc. It's fun, a nice quick little project to do as oppsed to scrapbooking

  2. hey, umm i actually stay for the pics. :)
    i'm sooooooooo majorly proud of you for restricting all that!

    mia is A bitCH! we all know it.

    by staying away from her eviiiil ways, you proved just how strong you are.

    :) keep it up!!!!!!!!


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